2019 THROWBACK

Week by week this is what I did last year.

1. Finding out the gender of our 2nd child.
2. Punctured a tire on the car.
3. Went to the movies w/ my mum & saw ‘Second Act’.
4. Visited my friend at her new apartment & brought her salt & bread.
5. First night our son slept in his own room.
6. 50% on sick leave from work.
7. Spent the afternoon w/ my mum.
8. Drove to Sweden with the family to buy food.
9. Met my friend after not seeing each other for one year.
10. My son and I spent a whole afternoon w/ my dad in Oslo.
11. Flew to Paris w/ my mum (& my daughter).
12. Renovated our new kitchen table from the thrift store.
13. Celebrated my mum’s birthday w/ my brother.
14. Met my best friends.
15. Visited my old school w/ my friend and my son.
16. Easter holiday – worked all week.
17. Drove to IKEA & went to a fabric store in Oslo alone.
18. Food shopping in Sweden w/ the family.
19. Start of Ramadan. Watched ‘The Hustle’ at the cinema w/ my mum.
20. Started maternity leave.
21. 38 week control.
22. First Kindergarten visit & visit from my mum. Our daughter was born.
23. Eid celebration w/ my husband’s family.
24. Visit from my friend & went shopping.
25. Food- and kids market w/ my children, mum and brother.
26. Met my best friends & celebrated my friend’s birthday together.
27. Breakfast at my dad’s.
28. 1st motorcycle ride w/ my dad. Met my friend & went to a cafe & the beach.
29. Met my friend at her house w/ my kids & her nephew.
30. Beach day w/ the family.
31. First day in kindergarten for my son & met my niece for the 1st time.
32. Shopping day w/ the family. Akvarium visit w/ my mum and the kids.
33. Norway’s biggest amusement park w/ my husband’s family.
34. Visited an open farm w/ my children.
35. Celebrated my 24th birthday w/ my mum, dad, brother, husband and kids. Also bought a new car.
36. 1st day back at work.
37. Goodbye dinner for a dear colleague.
38. 1st time our daughter tried baby food (mashed potatoes).
39. Last MC ride of the year.
40. Sweden w/ the family – food shopping.
41. Gokart w/ my brother & husband.
42. Our daughter rolls over for the first time.
43. Sunday breakfast at my dad’s.
44. Visited a huge soft play area w/ my husbands family and kids.
45. Sweden w/ my mum and daughter.
46. My son had to go to the doctor’s.
47. Met my friend.
48. Picked up my mum from the airport. Witnessed a motorcycle crash.
49. Brunch at my dad’s.
50. Sweden w/ my mum and daughter.
51. Cinema w/ my mum – we watched Jumanji: The next level.
52. First roadtrip w/ the family to Gothenburg.

Elizabeth

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Pregnancy & Body Image

You’re suppose to feel this overwhelming sense of joy when you’re pregnant. And anything else would just be unusual.

Well, it’s not. Your body goes through A LOT of changes in only 9 months. And even though you might be the only one knowing it for the first months, you’ll rapidly start to grow and show. And you can’t make your body stop getting bigger. You can exercise and eat as healthy as one only can with daily cravings, but in the end, you’ll get big.

You’ll hear comments like; “You’ve gotten so big. Are you sure there aren’t two in there”. It’s frustrating cause it’s like no one knows what you’re actually going through. And who knows if you’ll ever get back to the size you were before. The invisible pressure is definitely there.

Even as this is my second child I’m much bigger than what I was with my first. I keep telling myself that I’ll get back to my ‘normal’ self and this in it self is a miracle. But as much as it is a miracle, and I am truly grateful to be a mother again, I can’t help to feel like I’m not myself.

I don’t feel sexy in my body, I don’t feel as confident. Most of the time I feel bloated and like I have to pee every hour. I’ll never have my abs back to normal and my bellybutton will most likely not go back to it’s normal self. And I feel guilty for feeling this way. Because my body is getting bigger and I don’t like looking at myself in the mirror, even though I’m creating a human being inside of me.

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Elizabeth