Oh, sweet silence – how I’ve missed you. I adore you when you finally arrive, even though you might not stay as long as I wish.
Today started off early as per usual, though I did get to sleep in yesterday which was deeply needed. I did some last minute editing before I took my son out for a walk. Don’t underestimate the power of breathing in fresh air and changing your scenery once every day. It’s good to change wallpaper and see beyond the four walls of your own home. And I’m happy to announce that I finally think spring is coming. Right now the rain is washing away the remains of winter and giving fuel to threes and flowers arriving soon. I can’t wait to walk out in a summer dress and enjoy the sweet summer air.
Today on the other hand I have some errands to run. I’m the best at procrastinating because I don’t like to face my tasks head on. But when I finally do get the courage to deliver those CV’s personally, make that phone call, or drive to that auto mobile shop to get my car fixed, I feel great. I still have 14 CV’s left on my kitchen table who seek a new owner and hopefully a new job for me. But for today the mission is to go down to the postal office and send away a package. Call the auto shop and get a price for my car and hopefully also an appointment. On top of that I need to place an order for some hair products. Much to do, and no time to waste.
Hope you have a great start on your week!
She holds him tight at night
Hoping his soul won’t slip away
Wishing for an eternity
Praying they will last forever
Together till their last breath
Striving for success
Paradise where they’ll rest
Truly this is her deepest wish
Finally. I can sit down, relax and just breathe. Since I am a perfectionist and would like to have everything done right away, I couldn’t stop myself until I was done with everything for our new arrival. Now things are sterilized, washed, cleaned, built and sewn. We got out last piece of the puzzle today and now the waiting can really begin.
5 things I’ll miss
Oh, how I have loved feeling does tiny feet kick or a hand stretch.
Actually having an excuse to eat whatever you like has been wonderful. And suddenly getting an urge for ice cream and not having to go to the store and buy it yourself will truly be something I’ll miss.
Free back rubs and help whenever you need is a plus cause carrying another human is going to get hard.
Amazing thick hair that I haven’t had since I was a teenager. Really not looking forward to lossing it all again but it has been lovely while it lasted.
Suddenly you’ll get this wonderful glow and even though you might not see it, others will. Always good to know that you don’t need a highlighter to shine.
The last 48 hours have been long and exhausting. The quilt drives me crazy and before I lay my head down I think about the things I didn’t managed to do. I beat myself up, and I’m bruised from the inside out. I rage at the smallest things but put on a smile whenever I’m outside. I don’t recognizes myself anymore. I’m strangled by this life and wish for the time it will end. This is not the life I want to be living, waiting for death to arrive just to feel the release of the stinging pain.
I know this only took a minute to read but it helps. Every unsaid word can be written down forever, and that helps. Take a big breath, and don’t stop breathing.
We were born, forced to live
Without a choice but to die
In between we choose as we desire
Without seeing the end of our time
We keep on breathing, looking past the issue
That in the morning we might be leaving
Still we act invincible
Telling ourself tomorrow will be expected
We forget that we are all here to die
Without a choice we were forced to try
Don’t waste your time with meaningless ties
In the end we’ll all be broken inside