Leaving you behind will be one of the hardest things I’ll have to do. You are growing up and I wish I could go back and experience it all again. Even the long, sleepless nights. The laughter and heartbreak. It’s going too fast and soon it’s gone. I can’t even remember the little things. Your first smile or the first time you laughed. This time last year I had you so close, our hearts beating next to each other. Can we go back together, just you and I? Let’s live it again, even the hard times. I wouldn’t want it any other way because it was you. It was always you.
Momma loves you.
I’ve just scrolled threw all of the videos I’ve taken this past year with my son. Trying to soak up every sent and smell from him as long as possible. Kissing him as soon as the opportunity arrives because I know that I have to go back to work, leaving him for X amount of hours every day. I don’t even want to think about it but I know that is the reality. I wish I could rewind and do it all over again. The light night feeds, the first smile and laugh, and even all the diaper changes. I wouldn’t mind it at all if it meant I could spend it with my first born child again.
Everyone says the time will go fast but it truly ran away from me when he turned 6 months. Until then I had some sort of grip on the time I had with him, but when he started being more mobil and communicating more, even the fact that he started eating solids made a huge difference. I didn’t have that closeness to him as I did before and now he’s walking everywhere, being so active and milk from me is no longer interesting.
I don’t know what the future holds or how our days will develop, and to be honest I’m sacred of the unknown. But to be truthful I was scared before I got my son too and it turned out pretty awesome.
I can’t believe it’s been half a year
Time flied by like a night in disguise
One second ago I held you close
Two little feet, ten little toes
First a smile, then a laugh
Now six months later you’re rolling around
Finding your hands to your toys
Soon you’ll be able to walk and talk
While you’re growing up, we’re growing old
Stop time a little so we can be with you even more
There is no rush, so I’ll stop searching for the next milestone
And enjoy the time with our firstborn child
Between diaper changing and feeding there isn’t a lot of free time to what I used to be able to do in a day. I’m lucky if I’m able to get one set of laundry going and get the dishes from last night out of the way. A shower is also highly appreciated cause that’s a little ‘me time’ squeezed in to the day.
I can’t wait to get a normal routine going again but right now it’s a bit difficult cause I never know when the little one wants food. Which can vary from every hour to every three hours. Anyway, as for now I’ll count myself lucky if I get one blog post a week out, but I’m going to try my best to write more then that.
I know, I know, I’ve been so bad at posting lately and you have no idea how guilty I feel. But (you know there’s always a but) I’m going to start making some changes. I’m going to try to juggle work, YouTube, WordPress and let us not forget living a bit better than I’ve done lately. Since I love YouTube and WordPress endlessly I forget to live a little once in a while.
I’m not going to give everything away at once but I can tell you that I am going to move soon, travel and experience some new things. I’m not going to tell you more than that, but keep coming back and you’ll get updated with the latest.
And sorry again for not posting as often! I love how much support I’ve gotten through followers and likes. I’m forever grateful – you keep me going!
Is this what I’ve been waiting for? My birthday. All my life I’ve waited for this day, the day I turn 18. I remember when I was 13 years and couldn’t wait to grow up and become an adult. Just to know all the things you can do, being your own boss. But the only thing fun about growing up is.. well, you fill out the blank because I don’t know yet. But I do know that I’ve learned a lot in these 18 years of my lifetime and I’ve been so blessed having a wonderful family who cares more than anything and I love them to death. And all my friends who’ve been there through thick and thin with me, I couldn’t have made it without you. So thank you to all who has every given me a reason to live, laugh and love. You keep me going and I hope for another good 18 years to come and more!
Yesterday I spent the late afternoon at the beach with some friends. I didn’t go and swim cause that just isn’t going to happen here, but I do think I got a little more sun which I’m glad for cause now it’s just raining. I’ve got four days of work this week so hopefully they will go by fast and I’ll be back here in no time.
Also throwing in my favorite song right now:
Something I like about you