My miracle

Both my babies are in bed now, even though it happened to get a bit earlier for my son. But since he missed his afternoon nap today he was eagerly asleep once we put him down. It’s been 11 days since our little girl arrived and the days are slowly flying by. My due date was just four days ago but I’m so glad she came early. I don’t know what I would have done if I’d go another minute of being pregnant. I’m enjoying every moment of being a mom of two, trying to find our new routine and having lots of family time. I know a labor & delivery story is still missing from this page and my YouTube, but they are in the works. In the mean time let me reminisces of the things I don’t really miss from my pregnancy. 

5 Things I don’t miss from being pregnancy

  1. Itching all over my growing belly
  2. Not having any clothes that fit properly
  3. Seeing new stretch marks
  4. Not being able to go an hour without using the bathroom
  5. Having extreme back pain at the end of the day

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With that being said, I’m never going to be ungrateful for the miracle I have in my life. After nine long and painful months, she is finally here and I’m so lucky and thankful.

Elizabeth

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While we wait

It has been 9 long months but the wait is over. And while I waited for my little baby girl to arrive, I found myself doing various tasks around the house to get the time to pass. As I went along I added things to my to-do list and every time I added something it seemed as if I would never get my list done.


Cleaning the house – several times. Including washing the windows on the inside and outside. Washing our sofa cover. Cleaning the entire kitchen, inside and outside the cabins. And the usual dusting and vacuuming.

Washing baby clothes. I still had some clothes from my son that I though were unisex which I dug out while I simultaneously went through his old clothes and gave some away for donation. I also received a lot of clothes from colleges that needed a wash and some new clothes I bough just for our baby girl.

Sewing. I actually did quite a lot of sewing while I waited for the baby to arrive. I had a list of things I wanted to make and it was a perfect time to get around to it since I had a lot of spare time on my hands. The only tricky part was getting around to cut out all the fabric since my belly was mostly in the way. But I did manage to make a jacket, a bedsheet and up-cycling some old clothes.

Baking. Now I wish I did more of this but manage to make a cake or two, one of which was a delicious carrot cake.

Colouring my hair. The last week I was really bored and scratched my brain to find something to do. I got more and more sick of seeing my dull hair so I ordered some hair bleach and colour. When my products finally arrived I took my hairdressing skills to the test and changed my hair.

Making YouTube videos. Now I knew I wanted to have a little break from filming when the baby arrived so I decided to pre film a couple of videos which I will post soon.

Packing our hospital bag. I waited till I was 35 weeks pregnant to get on with packing the hospital bag. If you want to see the content of my bag I will leave the video link here.

Giving my son a hair cut. Yet again I found my hairdressing skills come to use and actually managed to cut my sons hair twice before the baby arrived. I love seeing him with short, clean cut hair – it makes him look so fresh and young.

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That’s how I spend somewhat of my time waiting for our baby girl. I also had some shifts at work when they needed me and spent a lot of quality time with our son. Now a new routine awaits us and I’m excited to see what that will mean.

Elizabeth

To My Daughter

These words are for you

As long as I can remember I’ve wanted to meet you
I don’t ever want you to think you’re not meant to be
Because this was planned by the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful

Wondering who you’ll become
Thinking about our time together
Hoping I can live up to your expectations
Wishing we’ll never fight –
Knowing fully that there will be days
were I’m not going to be your favourite

I pray you’ll never feel restrained by our religion
And grow up to love Islam & Allah
Knowing what our goal is
Because I want to meet you again in Paradise

I hope I can be the one you look up to –
The one you can turn to
I’m going to try my best
but so scared I’ll disappoint you,
that I’ll disappoint myself
Scared of the world you’ll grow up in
Knowing I won’t be able to protect you


Elizabeth

Pregnancy & Body Image

You’re suppose to feel this overwhelming sense of joy when you’re pregnant. And anything else would just be unusual.

Well, it’s not. Your body goes through A LOT of changes in only 9 months. And even though you might be the only one knowing it for the first months, you’ll rapidly start to grow and show. And you can’t make your body stop getting bigger. You can exercise and eat as healthy as one only can with daily cravings, but in the end, you’ll get big.

You’ll hear comments like; “You’ve gotten so big. Are you sure there aren’t two in there”. It’s frustrating cause it’s like no one knows what you’re actually going through. And who knows if you’ll ever get back to the size you were before. The invisible pressure is definitely there.

Even as this is my second child I’m much bigger than what I was with my first. I keep telling myself that I’ll get back to my ‘normal’ self and this in it self is a miracle. But as much as it is a miracle, and I am truly grateful to be a mother again, I can’t help to feel like I’m not myself.

I don’t feel sexy in my body, I don’t feel as confident. Most of the time I feel bloated and like I have to pee every hour. I’ll never have my abs back to normal and my bellybutton will most likely not go back to it’s normal self. And I feel guilty for feeling this way. Because my body is getting bigger and I don’t like looking at myself in the mirror, even though I’m creating a human being inside of me.


Elizabeth

2018 Rewind

1th to 5th of January – Edinburgh, Scotland
Like most years I was eager to discover more of the world and I was happy to finally book my plane ticket to Scotland where I would visit my cousin. She’s the one person in my family that I can actually share everything with. I got driven to the airport & when I was about to say goodbye I chocked on my own tears. I was so sad to leave my son behind for the first time but at the same time I was so ready to do so. I couldn’t even give him a kiss cause I knew I would be balling my eyes out if I did. After an almost tearful goodbye and very empty flight I was in Edinburgh for the next 5 days. Blogpost here.

8th of January – Last day as a hairdresser
After a relaxing start to the new year I found myself back at work Monday the 8th. To our surprise my boss had reported the salon where I worked at to bankruptcy. Suddenly the stable job I had was out of my reach. The next morning the salon was permantly closed. I walked out the front door Monday night never to see my colleagues again. 

15th of January – Jacob’s 1st birthday
One week later my son had his first birthday. He was turning one and I decided to invite my family and best friend to the celebration. Inspired by my British holiday I tried to bake scones which turned out to taste like bread. Nevertheless we had cupcakes, banana cake, coffee and my son had a few presents. 

15th of March – Started my weekly vlogs
Being unemployed for the last weeks made me itching to do something creative. I still made my weekly videos on Youtube but I wanted to up my game. I started filming weekly vlogs. For now they’ve only lasted 30 weeks but it was a good go and maybe I’ll feel the need to start again in the future. See my first weekly vlog here. 

30th of March – Celebrated my mum’s birthday @ Latter
My mum turned yet another year older & my brother and I went out with her to a comedy club. Right in the middle of easter week and to our surprise the place was full. Some good but mostly inappropriate jokes where made and I wasn’t in my bed until the early night of the next day.

23rd of April – Started a new job
After almost 3 month of job searching, countless turn downs and a handful of interviews I finally goy my dream job. At the time all I wanted to do was work in retail & I couldn’t believe my luck when my former boss called me to congratulate me on the position. I was over the moon with a great raise, personal discounts and a great boss. I felt like this was the beginning of a new career.

17th of May – My 3rd Ramadan
Three weeks into my new job, Ramadan was yet again upon us. A time I was looking forward to but anxious to meet since this would be my first Ramadan where I would fast for 30 days. Watch my Ramadan preparation video here. 

28th of June – Hottest summer yet
Living in the northern part of the globe it would have you believe that our summers are mild and bearable, maybe to the point where you’d say this isn’t summer weather at all. Well, this year that all changed. We had around 25-30 degrees from about May to July. Though most people couldn’t believe their luck, I was most nervous for the drought while sweeting buckets 5 minutes after I’ve left the house (almost).

24th of July – We bought our first motorcycle
A long dream of mine was to get my motorcycle licenses and when my husband joined in on that dream we made it a reality. He had passed his driver’s exam and the only logical conclusion was to buy a new MC. So we did, a Yamaha MT 03.

9th to 12th of August – Venice, Italy
I was itching for another holiday and Venice had been on my ‘to-see’ list for a good while now. So when my mum was on board with the idea and I finally found a dissent hotel – we booked our flight and were on our way. Even more hotter and humid than you can imagine but so beautiful. A lot of tourism but I’m very glad I got to check that place of my bucket list. We had absolute nothing planned that week, other than eating a lot of spagetti, pizza, drinking amazing Italian coffee and gelato. Watch my holiday video here.

3rd of October – Our 2nd positive pregnancy test
Since the mid of summer we decided to expand our family yet again and actually ‘planned’ our 2nd pregnancy. I always knew I wanted my children to be close in age so when I finally took a pregnancy test, after being 1 week late, it was the perfect time. Now I’m 18 weeks pregnant and so eager to know how our new life will look like.

26th of October – Finally got our marriage licences 
After 3 years my husband and I finally went down to city hall & legally got married by Norwegian law. We had our Nikkah on the 24th of October 2015 but I wanted to wait until I was at a better place with my family to tell them that this was the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. It was a Friday afternoon, my husband & son and myself went down there and 10 minutes later we were officially married by the eyes of the law. 


Elizabeth

One year ago

It was early Wednesday morning. The sun had made its way out behind the trees far away at the east. I awaited nervously for the two lines to appear. Anticipation was rising and even though I knew, I waited for five minutes.

I watched my reflection in the mirror and couldn’t help but to smile back. An exiting time was ahead. There we were, two instead of just one. I went back to bed wondering who you would become.

Now one year later I can finally hear you laugh, see you smile and hold you close. Knowing now that my life was never complete without you here.

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Elizabeth

First workout

It’s been a good while since I’ve put on my workout clothes and worked out. During my pregnancy I worked out two or three times. Other than that I’ve just looked after what I ate. Staying hydrated and eating healthy, moderate meals. Now that my pregnancy is over I want to start my fitness journey again.

I was a big fan of fitness centers and trained several times a week. Now that I have a baby I want to incorporate my workout routine into my stay at home mum life. Already two weeks after my delivery I felt ready to start working out gain. But all the doctors , midwifes and other mums suggested to wait at least six weeks. In the mean time you should go for long walks. So I did, but yesterday, after five weeks and one day I couldn’t wait any longer. So I browsed through my workout playlist on YouTube and did a twenty minute post natal fitness routine. This was so tough though and I could feel my body was out of shape.

Now I’m sitting on my couch struggling every time I have to get up because I’m so sore. I know tomorrow will probably be worse, but I can’t wait for my second workout. The key for me is to stay motivated and change up my workouts so that I won’t get bored and quit. After all this is a life style and not a diet.

Elizabeth